Saturday, July 30, 2011

I Have Returned

Take heart, ye poor souls of the Digital continent; I have returned! I know how hard my absence has been for you few, you poor few, who read this, and I want to take this time to apologize for not posting much lately.

Now onto my life.

I. Love. St. Louis.

So much to do, so much to see... Oh, and my Nana's here. kinda makes the whole drive worth it, I guess :). A staple of our trips to StL is a visit to the City Museum. I know you're probably thinking "City Museum, sounds boring!" but I assure you it is almost the best place on Earth. Would a picture help? How about 3?

almost everything you see here is to be climbed

That's just a part of the outside. Just a part! All of this is climbing as well.

It's in an old shoe factory, those chutes are now slides. One of them is 10 stories long!
At this point, you might want to pick those pieces of your skull off the ground, cuz your mind just got blown! There's tons of slides, climbing areas, little nooks and crannies to crawl through. There's a giant playground outside, the first floor is split between hamster tunnels, like at McDonalds, fake caves with all kinds of different passageways, and another big room that's just too complex to describe. The second floor features a large room which canonly logically be used for private gatherings, and the third floor is an eclectic mix of things, including a circus and a skatepark sans skates. Oh, and EVERYTHING is made of recycled materials. Everything. Of course, all that climbing and all the tight spaces has its downfall. you might just come away from your day at the Museum looking like this...
Oh, and every single muscle in your body will ache for about 3 days. But it's still totally worth it. I promise. 

Here's a link to their website:

Sunday, July 24, 2011


Where is Patrick Hoelscher currently located?

That was a Jeopardy reference, not a serious question. It's all right I guess. I'm here for a family reunion, and we're staying a ways outside of the main part of the city; it's bearable. Anyways, I just wanted everyone to know why I won't be posting as regularly as I've been striving to. Mainly because I have to walk a quarter-mile before I can steal someone's wifi, but also because I am on vacation.

We drove through Fayetteville, Arkansas, today. I have to say, I was impressed. Once you get onto I-540 and start winding through the Ozarks, you start to feel like you're miles and miles away from civilization. Which for the most part, you are. Then, you come up a hill and around a corner and BAM! There's Fayetteville. As I was saying to a friend earlier, it's actually quite dramatic and impressive how it just appears before you. It looks like a good college town, but I'm not sure it would be worth the 6-hour drive. Plus, nobody's ever gonna beat Aggieland. It's not even a contest.

Anyways, that's my musings for today. I apologize for the brevity of my writing, but I have to get up early tomorrow morning to take a zipline tour of the forest here. Whoop! (I went ahead and pushed already, so don't bother yellin at me when I get back)

Goodnight, and good luck!

Friday, July 22, 2011


Another late night post. I do apologize for this, but my work schedule these last few days has not allowed me to write in the early evening when I would prefer. Whatever, enough of my whining.

Big News! I got two new books today! They are:
Simple English Propers, Composed and Edited by Adam Bartlett
This is a super awesome book, and I am SO EXCITED! For those of who who have never heard of it (probably all of you, honestly) it is a new English translation of many of the older Latin Propers for the Holy Mass, with arrangements in the traditional chant style. It has an Introit, Offertory, and Communion chant for every Sunday and major feast day of the year! The cool thing about the Propers is that they are what the missal instructs us to sing/speak/chant at mass. Of course, many church choirs don't listen to what the missal tells them, and we are stuck with semi-appropriate hymns instead of the Propers.

The next book is Crossing the Threshold of Hope, by Blessed Pope John Paul II

I picked this one up at Half-Price Books for $8 while searching for an old, large book to make a book-safe out of. Excellent find. I haven't really started reading this one yet, but I cannot wait to dig into it!


Thursday, July 21, 2011

Aw Schultz...

First and foremost...Subscribe!!!!!

I have a new Man-crush: Colonel Allen West, Republican Representative from Florida.
He even looks like a baller!
Why, you might ask, the new found admiration? 

Let me tell you:

Rep. Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, a baby-murdering (she formerly owned and operated one of the few abortion facilities that did late-term abortions), arrogant, self-righteous really, really mean lady ripped into him on the House Floor after he gave a speech about the Cut, Cap, and Balance plan for the budget. Not only that, she did it after he had left the chambers, calling him a sellout and a traitor to his constituents. 

Being a Veteran of Iraq and a retired Lieutenant Colonel with 20 years of service to the U.S. Army, Mr. West is hardly the type to take such an underhanded swipe lying down. So rather than stick his fingers in his ears and say "I can't hear you I can't hear you", he hit back, with this to say about Rep. Schultz:

Let me make myself perfectly clear, you want a personal fight, I am happy to oblige. You are the most vile, unprofessional ,and despicable member of the US House of Representatives. If you have something to say to me, stop being a coward and say it to my face, otherwise, shut the heck up. Focus on your own congressional district!

I am bringing your actions today to our Majority Leader and Majority Whip and from this time forward, understand that I shall defend myself forthright against your heinous characterless behavior……which dates back to the disgusting protest you ordered at my campaign hqs, October 2010 in Deerfield Beach.
You have proven repeatedly that you are not a Lady, therefore, shall not be afforded due respect from me!
Steadfast and Loyal, Congressman Allen B West (R-FL)
Suck it, Schultz!
Unfortunately for Mr. West, MSNBC rounded up some airhead liberal women who somehow came to the conclusion that this pointed email constituted sexual harassment. I know, I'm as confused as you are right now. That's beside the point though. Representative West, you are my HERO!

Donations can be made to Rep. West here

Oh, and for your viewing entertainment!
I know they're almost completely unrelated... but they're hilarious and you should watch them. Satire is a great teacher.


Wednesday, July 20, 2011

AA 92!!

Here, as promised, my narrative of  Aggie Awakening 92:

Friday: Setup for a few hours, blech. Retreaters arrived!!! Table 5's costumes ROCKED! We had a good group at our table; among them a seminarian, a probable seminarian, and several from other schools. Winning! After a few talks, some activities, RECONCILIATION(!) and family time it was off to dreamland for this little gopher...

Saturday: As always, Saturday morning came waaaaaaay too early, and it brought with it a stiff back and super-duper amounts of excitement for SATURDAY OF AWAKENING!!!The day was full of gophering, listening, taking pictures of blind retreaters stumbling all over themselves, and other such gopherous activities, all culminating in ADORATION!! (note: when i say "ADORATION" it should really be said like "ADORATION!!!!!!!!!" in your head. Just saying.) 

SUNDAY!!: It was Sunday of Awakening. Nuff said. 

So there, in a nut shell, is my Awakening experience timetable rundown! I would love to go into details about all the blessings I received and how the Lord worked on me and through me.. but I can't and I won't :) needless to say, I came away from AA 92 a better Catholic and with new understanding of myself and many other things. 

Now just for fun...

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Recap. Long, but I've Been Gone for a While

Hokay, so... It's been awhile. I told myself when I started this blog that I wouldn't do this to you, my lovely but rarefied readers. But I did, and two weeks have passed, and I really don't feel that bad about it because I have been utterly exhausted these past two weeks. Now on to the part where I egocentrically tell you all about the happenings in my life over the past few weeks and you pretend you're interested :)

I believe we left off with Casey Anthony. Not gonna recap that.

Since our last chat, I have become a Swim Instructor for the YMCA of Arlington. I taught almost exclusively preschool classes for the past session, and then a private backyard lesson for one young adorable almost-three year-old girl named Claire... and it was interesting. Even though I came home every day irritable, worn out, and just wanting to crash wherever I could find room, it was totally worth it. Those kids, even when I wanted to just let them sink, were retardedly cute. Even when they were gouging my skin with their little claws, and trying to strangle me, and screaming in my ears, they were still kinda cute. They took their toll though. All in all, I'm glad I'm a swim instructor. Even through all the negatives, I was, after all, teaching kids to not die in the water, as well as firmly crossing early childhood education off of my list of possible vocations. Just no. I was not blessed with that kind of patience.

Then came the weekend! Thursday night saw me and Stephanie driving down to College Station for the midnight premiere of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 with a bunch of our friends.
It. Was. EPIC!! I had not originally been a part of the group, as I had not planned on going early enough. However, God is good, and there was a last-minute extra ticket available, and I snatched that up like a hungry hippogriph! I didn't have a costume prepared, so I went as a wizard in disguise, which entailed shorts, long red soccer socks, and cowboy boots, topped off by a long, rainbow robe lent to me by Monica Wyrem. I looked pretty good considering I had like an hour to put it together.

After all that Excitement, I spent the night at my good friend Jon Hernandez's house where we stayed up till 5 am talking. Not a great idea. The next morning saw us up early and working (painting) on stuff for our Awakening table (i.e. the box, sign and my costume). Yeah, we know we procrastinated. It all worked out in the end though because they looked awesome!

Not too bad for just a few hours work!

Pretty soon we were under way for Somerville, Texas, and Aggie Awakening 92!! As always, an incredible, humbling experience. I was a Table Gopher for Table 5, and they just blew me away. But more about Awakening later.

Here's some good ol' liturgical chant for the road

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Letter of the Law

Unlike many people whose reactions I have read, I am actually happy that Casey Anthony was not found guilty. Not because i don't think she killed her daughter; I do. In fact, I think she is a despicable human being. No loving mother that I know of could possibly be out partying like Casey Anthony, knowing that their young daughter was missing. No, I believe that Casey Anthony was, indeed, very guilty. That said, the burden of proof is on the Prosecution to prove the defendant guilty, beyond a reasonable doubt. And in my limited following of the case (as limited as it can be without actually crawling under a rock) I came to feel that the Prosecution in this case was very sloppy. They failed, in my mind, to provide any truly incriminating evidence besides simple emotional appeals to the jurors. Contrary to what the district attorney seemed to think, "She went out partying and then lied about some things to us" is not a strong enough argument to convict a woman of capital murder charges and possibly end her life. So for this, I am very happy that Casey Anthony was acquitted. Despite the media's nearly uiniversal consensus that Anthony was guilty, and their constant repetitions of "how guilty she acted/seemed/sounded" there was still just not enough proof to take away a woman's freedom. Plus, it made Nancy Grace look like a complete idiot in front of the entire country and then left her speechless. Score. (I despise everything about that woman)

I have heard many comparisons today to the OJ case. I would like to take some time to dispel those comparisons here. In the OJ case (I keep thinking about the orange juice in the fridge while I'm writing this...) the prosecution did a darn good job of proving the where's, who's, how's, and why's of the case. However, the case was undermined by sleazy allegations of racism by a damned skilled defense attorney. In the Anthony case, however, the Prosecution failed to prove any reasonable explanations for the disappearance of little Caylee Anthony. They focused on circumstantial evidence and the oft-alluded to "spitball method." The defense, weak as it was and also of the "spitball method", still proved adequate enough to plant the seeds of doubt in the minds of the jurors, and to undermine the Prosecution's case. Another important thing to look at is the complete lack of forensic evidence. there just wasn't any!

Justice was served in Florida today, even though a murderer may have walked free. Alas, it is important to remember that all debts will be paid in full at the time of judgement. God's Justice is never thwarted, just as his mercy is never-ending, and his generosity is never outdone. Our Founders understood this when they wrote our Constitution, and they knew that is was much better that a guilty man go free than an innocent man lose his life. Always be mindful of this before making up your mind on an issue like this trial. God bless.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Spirit of '76

1776 that is...

Thank you, Lord, for the brave men and women who serve in our armed forces to make sure we are able to enjoy your bounty. Lord I ask that you keep them and their families safe and strong through their trials. Amen.

I've thought for a long time now that, if ever a draft were once again implemented, I would preemptively enlist in the Marines. Something about the pride and tradition of the Marine Corps is very attractive to me. In fact, it reminds me of the pride and traditions of Aggieland, only on steroids. They have traditions governing who salutes who, how that person salutes, when and how to wear your dress blues, etc. There's nothing PC (politically correct) about their pride. They think they're the best, and they say it. They don't pussyfoot around and avoid outright saying they're the best because they want to avoid hurting the Army's feelings, or they don't want to make the Air Force cry. No! They know they're the best and they'll be damned if they don't let everyone they meet know that they're the best. I think we cam learn a lot from that attitude. I think we can learn a lot from that attitude. I'm not saying that everyone should be prideful and boast, after all that is sinful, I merely think that we shouldn't be timid in telling the truth.  Plus, they're badass killing machines who deal death quickly and, often, invisibly to those who would seek to harm our nation. Can't beat that